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Mother with Cancer will 'never forgive' her daughter for not shaving head in solidarity
Mother with Cancer will 'never forgive' her daughter for not shaving head in solidarity
A cancer sufferer has been fiercely condemned online for allegedly pressuring her daughter into shaving off her hair. The mum’s own hair had been “destroyed” by chemotherapy and so she urged her 17-year-old child to cut hers in solidarity, according to her husband. The man explained what happened in a lengthy Reddit post, admitting that his wife’s “manipulative” behaviour had left their relationship in turmoil. He wrote: “My wife is currently battling cancer, and one of the things she’s told me she’s struggling with the most was losing her hair. She’s been given a near 100 per cent chance of survival since we caught it early, but the chemotherapy has destroyed her hair anyway, and she had to shave what was left of it off a few weeks ago. “Not long after that, she suggested we attempt to get our 17-year-old daughter, Anna, to do so as well. Anna has very long hair that she puts a lot of care into so I felt it was appropriate to ask her in private if she wanted to/would be willing to do such a thing. She told me that she didn’t want to cut her hair and I figured that was the end of that.” However, he went on: “Yesterday they came home from a ‘girls shopping trip’ [...] and Anna had a buzzed haircut. That struck me as odd after what she’d said, so after dinner I talked to her and she told me that my wife had said she would never forgive Anna if she didn’t show her support by buzzing her head. I asked her if she was happy about it and she said that she wasn’t." He continued: “When I went to bed, I brought it up with my wife and she said ‘it was Anna’s choice to or not, I just told her how I’d see the situation’. “I told her off, saying she needed to respect Anna’s personal choices and that a 17-year-old girl being against shaving her head wasn’t exactly out of the ordinary. However, my wife simply said it was to show support for her.” Wrapping up his post, he admitted: “I love my wife, and I understand that she’s going through something traumatic, however, her attitude comes off as very manipulative to me, and that’s not behaviour I feel I can personally accept. “I’m not sure if I can move past this to continue the relationship,” he concluded. His post on the AITA forum racked up more than 16,000 likes and 3,300 comments in just 16 hours as fellow Redditors voiced their thoughts on the mother’s behaviour. “I'm sorry that [your wife] has cancer, but what she did to your daughter was very abusive,” wrote one horrified commentator. “If she is unable to deal mentally with her disease and treatment, then she needs professional help, not to manipulate and coerce your daughter into making a choice that she didn't want to make. Make no mistake, she ABUSED your daughter.” Another agreed but added that “we need to dig deeper”. “I don't think this was about the wife wanting support so much as her being miserable and envious of her daughter's hair,” they suggested. “The wife is rightfully miserable right now and it's an amazing coincidence that the daughter has long, lovely hair that she's proud of and [takes] good care of. Looking at that long luxurious hair was a daily visual reminder to the wife of her own lost locks. Nice hair, be it long, short or shaved head by choice, is tied very strongly to a woman's personal concept of beauty.” They continued: “Misery loves company and the wife now has the satisfaction of knowing her innocent daughter feels just [as] horrible as she does and the bonus is the wife doesn't have to look at that constant reminder of the hair she lost.” And a third urged the original poster (OP) to take a “long hard look at his wife's relationship with their daughter to see what else she's done that might fit into this pattern”. “Telling your 17yo (sic) you'll never forgive her if she doesn't shave her head? Absolutely unacceptable, but probably isn't an isolated incident. You don't usually see people go from 0 to 60 that fast.” Another user seconded this theory, explaining that they’d suffered similar “abuse” from their own mum. They wrote: “My mother pulled the same hair stunt when her hair came out in clumps as part of menopause. Guilted me into cutting hair I could sit on into a pixie cut like hers. I cried in private for weeks after. “It was part of a much larger pattern of behaviour but this was the first time it was really visible so the first time anyone asked about it. I didn't even realise the guilt trips I'd been sent on until other people's questions made me think back and I learned guilt isn't love. My dad had no idea.” Meanwhile, cancer survivors agreed that they’d never put someone they love through the pain of losing their hair. “As a cancer survivor, I know how sucky this situation is for the OP's wife, but I have a bad feeling that she's going to play the cancer card ad infinitum because she feels life and everyone who doesn't have cancer owes her,” one wrote. Another added: “Cancer survivor too. Losing my hair was worse than losing my breasts. You can't hide it. I would never want someone I love to go through that.” Sign up for our free Indy100 weekly newsletter Have your say in our news democracy. Click the upvote icon at the top of the page to help raise this article through the indy100 rankings.
2023-08-21 23:26
Investors look past US tech sector as uncertain environment clouds outlook
Investors look past US tech sector as uncertain environment clouds outlook
By Lisa Pauline Mattackal and Divya Chowdhury MUMBAI Investors are looking beyond the U.S. technology sector's bounceback this
2023-05-20 03:29
Barcelona transfer rumours: Dybala interest; Lewandowski's Saudi Arabia offer
Barcelona transfer rumours: Dybala interest; Lewandowski's Saudi Arabia offer
The latest Barcelona transfer rumours - including stories on Paulo Dybala & Arda Guler.
2023-06-23 03:35
Alabama's Nick Saban visits kids with cancer, next up a lobbying trip to Washington
Alabama's Nick Saban visits kids with cancer, next up a lobbying trip to Washington
Alabama coach Nick Saban is going from a visit with children with cancer to a business trip to Washington
2023-06-07 05:01
Through a different lens: How AP used a wooden box camera to document Afghan life up close
Through a different lens: How AP used a wooden box camera to document Afghan life up close
For Associated Press photographer Rodrigo Abd, a main attraction of working with a traditional Afghan box camera is the intimacy it provides with his subjects, and the slow pace that allows for a unique window into daily life
2023-09-22 12:08
Who is Yaqub Salik Talib? Ex-NFL star Aqib Talib’s brother pleads guilty to shooting rival coach dead at youth football game
Who is Yaqub Salik Talib? Ex-NFL star Aqib Talib’s brother pleads guilty to shooting rival coach dead at youth football game
Yaqub Salik Talib has accepted a sentence of 37 years in prison after pleading guilty to the murder of 43-year-old Michael Hickmon
2023-07-23 18:59
Modern Warfare 2 Weapon Mastery Challenges Explained
Modern Warfare 2 Weapon Mastery Challenges Explained
Here's a breakdown of everything you need to know about Weapons Mastery Challenges in Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2.
1970-01-01 08:00
NHL-Vegas hits the jackpot, beat Florida to win Stanley Cup
NHL-Vegas hits the jackpot, beat Florida to win Stanley Cup
The Vegas Golden Knights beat the Florida Panthers 9-3 on Tuesday to win the National Hockey League's Stanley
2023-06-14 11:13
Olga Carmona fires Spain into first Women’s World Cup final amid late drama
Olga Carmona fires Spain into first Women’s World Cup final amid late drama
Olga Carmona’s stunning late winner fired Spain into the World Cup final with a 2-1 win against Sweden. In a cagey contest with few chances for either side, the game suddenly sprung into life in the final stages with three goals in the final 10 minutes of normal time. Barcelona winger Salma Paralluelo, 19, gave Spain the lead in the 81st minute, but her goal was soon cancelled out by Rebecka Blomqvist. But Carmona responded in emphatic fashion just one minute later, sealing a final clash against either Australia or England on Sunday. Spain kept possession well in the opening stages and had a chance when a looping cross found Alba Redondo at the back post, but her header was cleared by Sweden. They struck again minutes later with some good build-up around the box allowing Carmona to shoot from the edge of the area, but it just whistled past the bottom corner. Sweden then had a half-chance at the other end when Johanna Rytting Kaneryd headed wide before Aitana Bonmati looped a cross in for Jennifer Hermoso but goalkeeper Zecira Musovic comfortably collected. Another attack came from a Spanish free-kick which went as far as Alexia Putellas, who whipped the ball into the box and Magdalena Eriksson did well to quickly head the ball away. Sweden had a great opportunity to take the lead just before half-time when Nathalie Bjorn picked out Fridolina Rolfo at the back post, but her half-volley was pushed away by Cata Coll. A slow start to the second half saw Stina Blackstenius try her luck from the right-hand side of the box, but her attempt was easily saved by Coll, who then made an excellent dive to palm Rytting Kaneryd’s cross away. Spain had some tidy build-up play around the box and had a great opportunity when Hermoso found Redondo in the box, but she was unable to cleanly strike it. The match looked destined for extra time with neither side having any real clear-cut chances, but it suddenly burst into life in the final 10 minutes with three goals in eight minutes. After dominating possession, Spain finally found the breakthrough in the 81st minute when Hermoso’s cross was cleared into the path of Paralluelo and the substitute tucked the ball into the bottom corner. Their lead was short-lived though as Sweden hit back in the 88th minute when Lina Hurtig headed down a cross for Blomqvist to smash the ball first time across the goalkeeper and into the top corner. Spain snatched the winner just one minute later when a short corner was played out to Carmona on the edge of the area and she smashed the ball from the outside of the box above Musovic’s head, with the goalkeeper unable to get a strong enough hand to keep it out. Read More England and Australia’s old rivalry has new stage as World Cup arrives at its biggest moment FA ‘disappointed’ after Matildas secure tickets in allocated England section England vs Australia: Kick-off time and how to watch on TV Old rivalry has new stage as World Cup arrives at its biggest moment Women’s World Cup LIVE: England vs Australia build-up as Spain reach final
2023-08-15 20:15
Jadon Sancho unsure of Saudi Arabia interest with Man Utd loan exit likely in January
Jadon Sancho unsure of Saudi Arabia interest with Man Utd loan exit likely in January
Jadon Sancho is not keen on a move to Saudi Arabia as he prepares to leave Man Utd in January, with Dortmund and Juventus interested in loan deals.
2023-11-18 01:30
Plane crashes into power line in Houston, leaving 1 dead
Plane crashes into power line in Houston, leaving 1 dead
An aircraft hit a power line and crashed in Houston on Saturday night, killing one person and knocking out power in the area, according to the Harris County Sheriff's Office.
2023-07-24 01:13
Man Utd close on Champions League return, Southampton relegated
Man Utd close on Champions League return, Southampton relegated
Manchester United edged closer to a return to the Champions League next season with a 2-0 win over Wolves as Southampton were relegated from...
1970-01-01 08:00