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Dye Hard: How Blue Man Group Took Performance Art Mainstream
Dye Hard: How Blue Man Group Took Performance Art Mainstream
The Smurf-colored trio came up in the counterculture. Then Intel came calling.
2023-06-02 05:33
Your forties is the perfect decade to have your first child – I’m living my best life
Your forties is the perfect decade to have your first child – I’m living my best life
Seven years ago, I was at my local antenatal class preparing for the birth of my firstborn. In my forties and armed with a coloured birthing ball, I looked around and gasped. All the other soon-to-be-mums were at least a decade younger than me. Some were nearly half my age. It briefly panicked me. Would I make any friends? Why did I leave it so late to have kids? Was I doing something wrong? In hindsight, though, I had no reason to worry: your forties is absolutely the best decade in which to have your first child. According to data published last week in The Daily Telegraph, the number of women becoming first-time mothers in their forties has increased in recent years: today, one in 25 UK births is to a woman aged 40-plus. That’s a lot of women just like me, despite the fact that getting pregnant over 35 gets you labelled as someone of “advanced maternal age”. That might sound harsh until you remember that older pregnancies used to be termed “geriatric” – thank God that’s been phased out. I’ve never regretted waiting until my forties, even if I had been trying for children for years by that point. My story is undeniably unique: my partner Alex took his own life while we were doing IVF, but that didn’t stop me from continuing to try to get pregnant. The maternal call was strong, so I decided to carry on with the process using Alex’s frozen sperm. Today I have two beautiful daughters with him: Lola, seven, and Liberty, five. It is an understatement to say I was ready for a baby at 40. I was grounded. Confident. Unlike when I was in my twenties or thirties, I knew exactly who I was and what made me tick. I had life experience. I no longer got FOMO. I didn’t even drink, having been through hell and back to become sober 20 years earlier. My career was fully off the ground, and therapy had helped me identify the family dysfunction I knew to ditch for the sake of my kids. I also wasn’t worried about my body bouncing back after the birth. I just desperately wanted to be a mum. Of course, there are all sorts of advantages to having children in your twenties and thirties. A huge bonus is that you’re simply more fertile. According to research, 31 is the magic age to have a baby – you’re still as fertile as in your twenties, but you also have more money. I’m sure motherhood in your fifties is great, too – although using your own eggs is highly unlikely, unless you froze them at some point before you turned 35. It means that some older mums often turn to donor eggs. Thinking back on my twenties and thirties, I don’t know how I would have managed motherhood. I don’t think I was ready to put my own needs on hold. I can’t imagine how hard it would have been to juggle work and my children, especially with the spiralling costs of childcare. I do accept that there are greater risks inherent in waiting to have kids. Both the quantity and quality of eggs dwindle. The rates of failed fertilisation, miscarriage and birth defects rise with age. There’s also the social pressure that comes with not having children early – you’re forced into endless conversations about the “ticking timebomb” of your fertility, and expected to fend off probing inquiries about your biological clock. The British Fertility Society advises women to start trying for a baby by the age of 32 at the latest, for a 90 per cent guarantee of having a child without resorting to IVF. But this advice simply wouldn’t have worked for me – I was determined to find the right person to have children with, and that didn’t happen until I was 35. When mine and Alex’s attempts to naturally conceive failed, and then Alex died, only at that point did I know I had the maturity to go it alone. I do have some regrets – I wish I’d frozen my eggs at the peak of my fertility in my mid-twenties, for instance (this process costs between £4,000 and £7,000 in the UK). But otherwise, having children in my forties was the right thing to do. Yes, I had my wobbles. I remember sobbing on the bathroom floor after yet another failed pregnancy test. I would berate myself for leaving it so late. I had to force myself to remember that many women experience fertility struggles in their twenties and thirties, too. All of those anxious feelings, though, flew out the window once I had my first child. When I left the hospital to begin parenthood alone, a new bag of nappies in hand, I didn’t have a meltdown. I was just so grateful that I’d had a baby, especially when the odds seemed so stacked against me. Sleepless nights trying to coax my child back to sleep were what I had most desired. It was all so good, in fact, that I went on to have a second child in my forties. I had a spare embryo in a freezer in St Petersburg. Now I call her Liberty. Every day since becoming a mum, I have embraced the mess and chaos, and appreciate every minute. I’m sure my younger self would cringe at the thought of me spending my evenings helping my children with their homework. But I’m proud to say that I’m living my best life. Read More Vanessa Hudgens addresses pregnancy speculation amid Cole Tucker engagement Rachel Bilson reveals she’s suffered multiple miscarriages Pregnant woman has maternity photo shoot in hospital before giving birth Hailey Bieber responds to ‘disheartening’ pregnancy rumours Like Rebecca Adlington, I also lost my baby at 20 weeks Britney Spears reveals she had an abortion while dating Justin Timberlake
2023-10-27 13:30
Star Wars Jedi Survivor gets Slow Mode and other accessibility options
Star Wars Jedi Survivor gets Slow Mode and other accessibility options
'Star Wars Jedi: Survivor' will include a Slow Mode toggle and other accessibility options.
1970-01-01 08:00
Public Storage Selling $2.2 Billion for M&A in Bond Market Dash
Public Storage Selling $2.2 Billion for M&A in Bond Market Dash
Public Storage is tapping the corporate bond market Monday to fund its acquisition of Simply Self Storage from
2023-07-25 03:22
Street Fighter 6 open beta starting next week
Street Fighter 6 open beta starting next week
Capcom has announced an open beta for the next instalment in the fighting game franchise.
1970-01-01 08:00
Texas seeks to bolster $1.8 billion fraud claim against Planned Parenthood
Texas seeks to bolster $1.8 billion fraud claim against Planned Parenthood
By Brendan Pierson Texas and an anonymous anti-abortion activist made a joint court filing over the weekend, urging
2023-06-06 05:38
Trump is not a spy. Why is he charged under the Espionage Act?
Trump is not a spy. Why is he charged under the Espionage Act?
An emerging defense of former President Donald Trump is that he should not be criminally charged. The federal indictment released on Friday describes him sloppily hoarding classified documents at his private clubs, after all, not selling secrets to a foreign country.
2023-06-14 00:10
Trump's intensifying rhetoric offers insight into how he might govern again as president
Trump's intensifying rhetoric offers insight into how he might govern again as president
Over the past two weeks, Donald Trump said shoplifters should be immediately shot, suggested that America’s top general be executed and mocked a political opponent’s husband who was beaten with a hammer
2023-10-05 12:02
Man sets fire to Koran pages outside Stockholm mosque
Man sets fire to Koran pages outside Stockholm mosque
A man set fire to pages of the Koran outside Stockholm's main mosque Wednesday, drawing a swift condemnation from Turkey which is holding up Sweden's bid to join...
2023-06-29 03:24
Football transfer rumours: Man Utd & Barcelona want Palhinha; Real Madrid make Haaland plan
Football transfer rumours: Man Utd & Barcelona want Palhinha; Real Madrid make Haaland plan
Saturday's football transfer rumours, with updates on Joao Palhinha, Erling Haaland, Kylian Mbappe, Reece James & more.
2023-09-09 16:00
Copper Tax Hike Approved in Chilean Senate, Heads to Lower House
Copper Tax Hike Approved in Chilean Senate, Heads to Lower House
Chile’s Senate approved a bill to raise taxes for copper producers as the left-leaning government attempts to increase
1970-01-01 08:00
Incoming Philadelphia mayor taps the city's chief of school safety as next police commissioner
Incoming Philadelphia mayor taps the city's chief of school safety as next police commissioner
Philadelphia Mayor-elect Cherelle Parker has selected longtime police official Kevin J
2023-11-23 01:36