LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA: Kelly Clarkson candidly spoke about the heartache she felt during her divorce from her ex-husband, Brandon Blackstock, while promoting her forthcoming album on the 'Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend' podcast on Wednesday, June 21.
Clarkson admitted during the conversation that she felt "alone" and "isolated" as she dealt with the divorce. She told O'Brien, "Divorce, in general, is hard. Separation, grief, loss, all of that is hard. I think the worst part is when you feel alone," per The Sun.
Kelly Clarkson recalls 'horrendous' divorce
Clarkson continued, "When you're going through something so horrendous and so publicly, there's no way to describe that...I think when you're that isolated...that's the worst to not feel like you can connect to another being and not heal in that sense."
Clarkson acknowledged that her mental health was badly affected while juggling her personal and professional commitments during the Covid-19 pandemic. She said, "I would be like truth, completely balling right before we would be shooting and be like, 'how do I fix this?'…It's hard to keep smiling. There was one time - I never cancel, I'm not that person - and I was like, I can't actually fix this. I looked like, oh God, put her in a jacket. It was real bad. I was really sad, so we had to cancel one day."
Kelly Clarkson's emotional 'tug-of-war'
On Glennon Doyle's podcast, 'We Can Do Hard Things', Clarkson spoke her relationship with Blackstock in more detail. She said that things between them had been rough as they tried to co-parent their two children, River Rose and Remington. She reportedly said, "If there's always this tug-of-war happening, like, 'Oh my god, I love you, but god, I hate you, you are just horrible.' That's not healthy. That's just emotionally going 9-0…but you finally get away from that, and you realize how 'OK, this actually feels better.'"
Clarkson continued, "Any kind of dependency [in a relationship], I feel like takes away from what the core loving relationship should be. No, I don't need you for any of that. I'm choosing you. I could freely be giving it to anyone, and I'm freely giving it to you and only you. I think that's so beautiful…[and some] people don't agree," as per reports.
Clarkson and Blackstock were married for seven years before the singer filed for divorce in 2020 citing irreconcilable differences. However, a bitter dispute over their marital assets ensued. She was forced to pay Blackstock nearly $1.3M in addition to $45,601 each month in child support when their divorce was finalized in March 2022. Seeking a fresh start, she announced that the 'Kelly Clarkson Show' was moving to New York City from Los Angeles.
